Saturday, 24 March 2012

Sleeping with the enemy..........

When did lovers get to be like buses: you wait around for ages and then suddenly the bed's full?I started seeing someone, he's not my boyfriend..... I'm not ready to use the B-word yet ..... he's my Special Friend. Now I know you don't get to a certain age without a bit of baggage ...... or else you'd be weird..... and frankly in the Louis Vuitton department I'm doing pretty well myself. However, there's the past and the present and the stuff that just won't go away. So just when I thought I'd let it go, moved on, opened myself to the bounty of the universe........ the Most Recent Ex started turning up: at the restaurant, in the cinema, Tate Modern, catching my eye while I'm trying to be fabulous and flirtatious, smiling at me, leaning over and whispering in my ear:

"Remember when we came here?"

It's quite annoying.

"Remember how much more fun we had? What laughs. Does he make you laugh? He doesn't really make you laugh does he?"

I've asked him to stop obviously, to please leave me alone, to go mess about in somebody else's head. But he isn't listening. Then he showed up in the bedroom, just sat in the corner at first .....which is never helpful ...... but that wasn't enough:

"Budge up, move over, room for one more. It's freezing out here. You don't really like this bloke anyway, do you?"

Mind you there isn't much room for him in the bed as it happens, not with my Special Friend, his ex-wife, estranged wife, his six kids and his ex-lover.......

And not a lot of laughs.

Top tip: It's an old one but worth remembering: Carpe Diem!!


26 comments:

  1. Good luck with then one my dear, just do what you enjoy, if not don't do it, easy to say I know.

    Love Jill x

    ReplyDelete
  2. After a few months of dating Mr TNMA (didn't want to jinx it) I eventually told my brother I had a special friend and he asked me if it was a woman.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm finding it difficult to relate to this one. I've had one special friend/girlfriend/Beloved/Partner/Wife for over 30 years, so it's a very rare thing if anyone else turns up in the bedroom or elsewhere. The one time it did happen (over 25 years ago)I found that mentally screaming "f*ck off" got rid of the spectre quite sharpish.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It took me a minute to respond. I had to come back. This is definitely one of those things I can offer no advice. For years I've been telling myself he's still there for a reason, but I, like you, just wish he'd already completed his stay.

    Maybe tomorrow. Surely by the day after that.

    Much love to you, Young at Heart.

    ReplyDelete
  5. This is happening to a friend of mine - the ex stalker tho not in her bedroom thank goodness.

    My brother's old girlfriend once woke to find a snoring man next to her in their bed - my brother asleep on her other side. Turned out it was a very pissed friend of the upstairs lodger who went to the loo then stumbled into the wrong bedroom ! Very red face the next morning !

    I just get the cats joining us in the marital bed.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hello:
    Mmmmm your life does seem rather crowded at the moment. As you say,probably to have reached the age that one has, there must be some baggage attached but your special friends do seem to be carrying trunk loads of it, whereas just a dainty overnight bag's worth would be quite enough to be going along with.

    Good luck....it sounds as though you need it!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Carpe diem indeed!
    Way to go!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Carpe diem! It's good you're staying away from that ex. In my experience, exes always lead to trouble!

    ReplyDelete
  9. They're exes for good reason, hum a tune as loudly as you can until he gives up and goes away with his tail between his legs. x

    ReplyDelete
  10. My wife introduced me to her friends as (my friend)Wally,right up to our marriage. Not even Special.... She had so many men chasing after her, she had to move to Germany, which is where we met.
    The stalking thing needs to stop now before it gets out of hand.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Blimey - you could both do with one of those memory zappers that they use in "Men in Black"!! I get the feeling from comments that you leave on my posts that I am going to end up knowing your fat northern ex! xx

    ReplyDelete
  12. Yep, from the sound of it I think you should tip out most of that stuff and start to consider what you want to go into your lightweight carrier bag......

    ReplyDelete
  13. Hmmm... could do with someone turning up in my bed at the moment, so if anyone's very pissed or has a friend who's pissed (a female one), it's the attic room at the top on the left.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I wish you luck and forgetfulness! (And I'll count my blessings.)

    ReplyDelete
  15. Good job I am as happily married as my wife tells me I am ...

    Still given I turn 50 later this year and completely sure that divorce papers aren't the special present from Mrs F it is good to know that there are future options out there...

    Carpe Diem indeed

    ReplyDelete
  16. Is the baggage Louis V? .. I kissed loads of frogs and dated many lemons (mixed metaphors...)before I found the husband and i always say don't send me out there again!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Wow - I'll have whatever you ordered! Carpe Diem indeed - but I have to agree with Vix on this one - they're ex-es for a reason - steer well clear!

    ReplyDelete
  18. We've got names for them, don't we -- frogs, lemons, bad pennies...

    ReplyDelete
  19. Oh dear.......... oh dear....... OH DEAR. There aren't handbooks handed out with hearts are there? :O(

    ReplyDelete
  20. I remember when my daughter broke up with her first boyfriend and I thought, now it starts, she's got those memories and comparing and looking back...

    ReplyDelete
  21. This is a great posting I have read. I like your article...

    busana muslim

    ReplyDelete
  22. There are some that just never go away. And it seems that only the magical moments are recalled while the shit times are mysteriously forgotten.
    Human nature indeed!

    ReplyDelete
  23. You had me at your title!!!!
    I'm 47 and yes,ye, and yes!
    pop by and enter to win a $100 dollar gift card to marketplace!
    Nice to 'meet' you :)
    Reva

    ReplyDelete
  24. I'd go with Twisted Scottish Bastard's delicate phrasings. Perfectly put.

    ReplyDelete